This op-ed article was featured in the Sheridan Sun's 'Head-to-head'. It is apart of a debate about the new law that was passed in California about young adults giving verbal and very clear non-verbal consent to sexual activity. Universities in California are to teach students the importance of a 'Yes' and what non-verbal consent looks like. Those under the influence of drugs or alcohol are not not eligible to give consent to sexual activity and police are to ask at what consent was established.
My
hope for this new law is that it will make people (not just men) think twice
before spiking someone’s drink or trying to get someone so drunk that they will
say ‘yes’ to sex.
When
I first read that consent could be something as simple as “leaning in” to the
other person, I immediately thought “Um, won’t that be taken out of context?”
but after reading more about it, it’s explained that each person must consent
at every stage of an encounter. A ‘yes’ to a kiss does not count as a ‘yes’ to
sexual intercourse.
Officials
reporting to the scene of a rape incident must now ask whether both parties had
a conscious and voluntary agreement to engage in sexual activity, as opposed to
asking a victim how forcefully they said “no.”
Another
great thing about this law is that universities now HAVE to talk about how
consent is mandatory and what proper non-verbal consent looks like, to all
students, both male and female. I really hope this will help young adults want
to talk about sex and what they actually like in bed. Aaah communication: the
sex and dating world will greatly benefit from that simple act of looking into
another person’s eyes and talking about what makes them happy… in the way of
physical intimacy, but that’s always a big scare for a lot of people.
Think
of where this could lead, not just in safe sex in college, but relationships in
general. I can’t tell you how many couples I know who NEVER talk about their
problems in the relationship or in the bedroom. Then they get into a huge
fight, they say things they don’t mean and they break up and lose a great
person in their life, all because of lack of COMMUNICATION!
But
that’s not what’s important about this law, it’s just a happy bonus prize. The
important thing is that now people will talk about sex, what they actually want
and don’t want and hopefully there will be fewer sexual assaults and rapes at
the college parties we all love to go to.
I’m glad this law is in
effect, and I hope more states, and eventually Canada, will soon establish a
law like this, not just to better our fun with hooking up with a random person
and having an awesome one-night fling, but also to make our relationships
healthier
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